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General Discussions Discuss No good deed goes unpunished in the Community Center forums; Need Advice about a High School issue. Background: DD16, on Student Council, peer tutor, elementary tutor, Special Olympics companion and a competition swimmer and is in all Honors and AP ...
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    HauntedGabe's Avatar
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    No good deed goes unpunished

    Need Advice about a High School issue.

    Background:

    DD16, on Student Council, peer tutor, elementary tutor, Special Olympics companion and a competition swimmer and is in all Honors and AP classes.

    DD is spearheading a committee for Student Council for Autism/Fundraiser.
    Competition between 1st hour classrooms collection change and some paper money for a walk for autism to be held at Soldier Field next month in Chicago.
    Winning classroom receives free breakfast served in their classroom.

    My daughter and one other girl have buckets in each room. Donations collected in class lst period, teachers place in provided envelope each morning and deposit in box by office secretary by 4th period. Girls give up study hall to count money, tally each classroom, post in teachers lounge. They will do this for 2 weeks.

    Yesterday:
    The girls went in early for SC meeting. The were immediately met by their SC advisor who is angry. Male teacher stated he turned in yesterday $l0.00 and they recorded zero. Female teacher said $2.50 turned in and $0.50 recorded. Advisor demanded an explanation. My DD said she knew the male teacher did not have an envelope, remembering 'cause he had been winning up to that point and thought it was odd there was nothing that day. The female teachers they thought they might have counted change and hoped if they cross checked it would be over $2.00 for that day. Explanation not accepted by advisor who indignantly told them that SC would have to replace the missing money and that was not the purpose of SC nor the fundraisers.
    Ouch to the feelings of the girls and DD is intelligent enough to get the implication of missing money. She said she was so upset during her classes all morning.

    During study hall they went back to the routine of counting. Advisor came in again indigently and stated the male teacher turned his envelope after they had already been picked up yesterday for counting so his envelope was still in the box with money intact, per secretary. The female teacher found at the end of the day that the girls returned the envelope with $2 still in there.
    So simple explanation, yet the advisor continued to be annoyed and told them it would now have to be counted in the office due to the problems of yesterday and stormed off. Now the DD is angry. Being treated poorly because of one teachers mistake and missing $2.00 and it being returned to the core teacher. No real harm.

    They want students to be caring and compassionate yet this is how they are treated the moment something does not go smoothly. I want to say something since I do not like my kid being treated this way, but what. What would you do?

  2. #2
    Cinderella2's Avatar
    Cinderella2 is offline Thrilled to know there are others who sparkle!
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    I would say nothing. Truly. Yes it is ridiculous and unfortunate and the advisor needs to do some serious apologizing. But, it is only just a couple of weeks and if nothing else happens, I think it is better to just let it blow over.
    Things like this happen in real life all the time and maybe learning this lesson early in her life your DD will learn to handle future incidents with the same dignity and grace.
    Eh, just my opinion.
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    vixen101485's Avatar
    vixen101485 is offline Queen of the Swaps, bow before me
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    What a shame. Why didnt they have a teacher supervising the counting to begin with.? That is the advisor's fault for not thinking this thru ahead of time and anticipating any problems, plus to cover her own butt. Hugs to your DD.
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    HauntedGabe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by vixen101485 View Post
    What a shame. Why didnt they have a teacher supervising the counting to begin with.? That is the advisor's fault for not thinking this thru ahead of time and anticipating any problems, plus to cover her own butt. Hugs to your DD.
    On the last day before spring break the advisor lady sent me an e-mail at the end of the day. Projects for your DD to do over spring break....Write proposal for school board, research autism for proposal, write press release for newspaper and prepare a statement for teachers to read to classrooms. Have DD be prepared when she returns to school the following Monday. Ugh. This is what I'm dealing with. What part of Break in Spring Break did she not get.
    And why was she not telling the DD what she wanted her to do. errr.

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    iwannabeminnie's Avatar
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    My opinion is that the girls should have counted the money in the office anyway. I have always preached and preached and preached to my children that the best way to keep yourself above reproach is to make sure there is accountability.

    Example: One of my daughter's friends had left something in the gym dressing room at school one afternoon and decided during a basketball game that night that she was going to go into the dressing room and retrieve it. My daughter came and told me where they were going and I put my foot down instantly. Had something come up missing from the dressing room during the game, her name could have come up. Instead, I had them get the athletic director to retrieve the forgotten item. Silly? Maybe, maybe not.

    As far as having her feelings hurt, I can totally understand that, but again, it's something she needs to get over. You can't make people behave the way you think they should behave.
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    mini-V's Avatar
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    I'm sure your dd was devastated when someone hinted of mismanagement of funds. Your dd knows she and her group did nothing wrong. You knew (probably from the get go) that she did nothing wrong. As long as your dd knows you believe in her, I think that is far more important. If you say anything to the arrogant teacher/adviser, then his/her hackles will be even more evident. I bet he/she treats other students and faculty the same way. As long as there is no lingering innuendo that money went "missing", then you will have to let it all blow over. If there is any further mention that the money was mishandled, then I would call, not email, the adviser. Email can be misunderstood, and all you want is to calmly let the adviser know that the veiled comments of stolen money, has not been addressed and that the adviser needs to clarify to all that the money wasn't included in the count because it wasn't turned in on the day it was collected. An apology is needed to your dd and all the SC members.

    Counting the money in the office may not be as convenient, and it does hint of a measure of mistrust on the part of the administration, but tell your dd that she and her fellow SC members can think of it as a way to avoid further accusations for the rest of the time that money is collected. Counting money can be tricky, and if there is a lot of change involved, then the room for error is increased. The administration should have provided an adult to assist in counting the money from the beginning.

    Unfortunately, your dd got a lesson of what it's like to deal with some people in the real world. You can bet that there is someone like him/her in every workplace. Insecure people always look to bring everyone else down. They don't usually apologize for jumping to conclusions either.

    I wish your dd and the SC members luck in reaching their goal. I commend them for organizing such a worthwhile event.
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    Keasmom's Avatar
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    It sounds like this person has issues, of the major variety. She may be jealous of your DD for who knows what reason, her fav student may be second fiddle to your DD and that would add issues, Also, if this person knows you are a BOE member, or advisor, educator, she may have a personal beef with you and is taking it out on your DD. She is being notably unprofessional, and an all out pain in the petunias, but saying anything would just fuel her fire and that is never good. You've said it before, never engage in a battle of the wits with an unarmed person. I'd give both of you a giant hug if I were there, and tell your DD that her grace under pressure is amazing. Maybe someone else involved in this will say something to that crankt bat, and she will find appropriate humility. Hugs to both of you and you have my permission to e-mail anytime you need a good ranting place, I understand the need to purge the bad and typing it out helps a lot.
    Last edited by Keasmom; 04-11-2008 at 02:12 PM. Reason: brain, fingers working against each other
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    I agree with previous comments, counting the money in the office/with adult supervision would have been a good idea from the start. BUT, a teacher should have tried to think calmly and logically to investigate the issue before getting angry. Bad teachers setting a bad example!! I hope your DD can mark this up to a learning experience and continue to do such great work with pride in the future. Good luck to her x
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    amberpi is offline B-Ticket Holder
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    Quote Originally Posted by HauntedGabe View Post
    They want students to be caring and compassionate yet this is how they are treated the moment something does not go smoothly. I want to say something since I do not like my kid being treated this way, but what. What would you do?
    Sounds like you're raising quite the young women there.

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