1. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
2. Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
3. He said I was average - but he was just being mean.
4. Show me a piano thrown into an army trench, and I'll show you A-flat major.
5. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
6. He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.
7. Old doctors never die they just lose their patience.
8. A prisoner's favorite punctuation mark is the period. It marks the end of his sentence.
9. When asked by a passenger how high he would get, the pilot replied,'I don't do drugs.'
10. To many girls the word 'marriage' has a nice ring to it.