Top Ten Puns

**tiggerguy** · 12-31-2005, 11:30 PM

from Punoftheday.com

1. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

2. Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

3. He said I was average - but he was just being mean.

4. Show me a piano thrown into an army trench, and I'll show you A-flat major.

5. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

6. He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.

7. Old doctors never die they just lose their patience.

8. A prisoner's favorite punctuation mark is the period. It marks the end of his sentence.

9. When asked by a passenger how high he would get, the pilot replied,'I don't do drugs.'

10. To many girls the word 'marriage' has a nice ring to it.

**GaRain** · 01-01-2006, 12:10 PM

buh dump ching (ya need some drums there....)

**vixen101485** · 01-01-2006, 02:00 PM

Funny and cute

**olmec26** · 01-02-2006, 03:59 PM

When I become a Jungle Cruise skipper, I might have to work some of these into the narration...

**SnwhtNdwrfs** · 01-03-2006, 05:01 AM

Very punny...I mean funny!

**dzney4lyf** · 01-03-2006, 09:08 AM

Originally Posted by SnwhtNdwrfs

Very punny...I mean funny!

**Conceited Ape** · 01-03-2006, 01:53 PM

Coming up with good puns is like bread--ya gotta rise up to the challenge. You can't loaf around. It's the yeast you can do for the dough you make. Oh, sorry......was that a rye comment?

*quits while he's on a roll.

**dzney4lyf** · 01-03-2006, 02:05 PM

Originally Posted by Conceited Ape

Coming up with good puns is like bread--ya gotta rise up to the challenge. You can't loaf around. It's the yeast you can do for the dough you make. Oh, sorry......was that a rye comment?

*quits while he's on a roll.

I didn't realize that lame was a new flavor..

**Conceited Ape** · 01-03-2006, 02:52 PM

That's harsh. Kinda reminds me of that job I had at the juice factory. I got canned. I couldn't concentrate. They really put the squeeze on, and just worked the pulp out of us. Orange you glad I'm done with these?

**dzney4lyf** · 01-03-2006, 02:53 PM

Originally Posted by Conceited Ape

That's harsh. Kinda reminds me of that job I had at the juice factory. I got canned. I couldn't concentrate. They really put the squeeze on, and just worked the pulp out of us. Orange you glad I'm done with these?

you're killing me!!!

**Conceited Ape** · 01-03-2006, 04:03 PM

Killing you? Hmm, are you serious? Dead serious, I guess. Sounds like a pretty grave matter to me, and I'd better dig into it......

**AlecTronic** · 01-03-2006, 04:20 PM

You know its too bad for Shrunken Ned. He should have quit while he was ahead.

**AlecTronic** · 01-09-2006, 03:38 PM

Ok, a year or two ago, when disney got control of the muppets, they thought of redoing the studios wth more muppets references. here is the #1 brainfart from the whole thing:
Fozzy Bear singing for Aerosmith:

Wocka Wocka Wocka This Way