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General Discussions Discuss punny things in the Community Center forums; Let me share with you a couple of keys to playing piano....
  1. #1486
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    Re: punny things

    Let me share with you a couple of keys to playing piano.
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    Brian
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  2. #1487
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    Re: punny things

    I asked somebody a question about pi, their answer was never ending!
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  3. #1488
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    a punny story

    Recently, the Seattle Orchestra was doing Beethoven's Ninth under the baton of Milton Katims...
    Now at this point, you must understand two things: Firstly, there's a quite long segment in this symphony where the bass violins don't have a thing to do. Not a single note for page after page. Secondly, there is a night club right across the street from the Seattle's Orchestra Hall, rather favored by local musicians.
    It had been decided that during this performance, once the bass players had played their parts in the opening of the Ninth, they were to quietly lay down their instruments and leave the stage, rather than sit on their stools looking and feeling dumb for twenty minutes. Well, once they got backstage, someone suggested that they trot across the street and drink a few brews.
    After they had downed the first couple rounds, one said, "Shouldn't we be getting back? It'd be awfully embarrassing if we were late."
    Another, presumably the one who suggested this excursion in the first place, replied, "Oh, I anticipated we could use a little more time, so I tied a string around the last pages of the conductor's score. When he gets down to there, Milton's going to have to slow the tempo way down while he waves the baton with one hand and fumbles with the string with the other."
    So they had another round, and finally returned to the Opera house, a little tipsy by now. However, as they came back on stage, one look at their conductor's face told them they were in serious trouble. Katims was furious! And why not? After all...

    It was the bottom of the Ninth, the basses were loaded, and the score was tied.
    Brian
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  4. #1489
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    Re: punny things

    He bent over to pick up a sieve and strained himself.
    Brian
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  5. #1490
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    Re: punny things

    Smells in the army are according to rank.
    Brian
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  6. #1491
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    Re: punny things

    I had some back trouble, but it's all behind me now
    Brian
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  7. #1492
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    Re: punny things

    I like to stay current with the electrifying adventures of Sherlock ohms.
    Brian
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  8. #1493
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    Re: punny things

    When the spice ships used to bring goods to the king the captain was peppered with compliments.
    Brian
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  9. #1494
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    Re: punny things

    Why did the sleuth always carry an umbrella with him? He had been told that it was mist defying.
    Brian
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  10. #1495
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    Re: punny things

    A dog breeder crossed a setter and a pointer at Christmas time and got a pointsetter
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  11. #1496
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    Re: punny things

    Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under.
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    Re: punny things

    Two friends took ropes to school so that they could skip out.
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  13. #1498
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    Re: punny things

    Have you heard the joke about the airplane? No. Well, it was way over your head anyway.
    Brian
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  14. #1499
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    Re: punny things

    A cowboy's steers were so funny they were known as the laughing stock.
    Brian
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    Re: punny things

    I keep falling off my bike, but I just get right back on it and ride. I'm a firm believer in re-cycling.
    Brian
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