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General Discussions Discuss punny things in the Community Center forums; Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat minor....
  1. #256
    disneydarling's Avatar
    disneydarling is offline ...and the mome raths outgrabe
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    Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat minor.
    Sisterhood of the traveling pirate in the pants: charter member

    A friend will help you mend a broken heart; a best friend will get a shovel and help you dig the hole.

  2. #257
    disneydarling's Avatar
    disneydarling is offline ...and the mome raths outgrabe
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    A prisoner's favorite punctuation mark is the period. It marks the end of his sentence.
    Sisterhood of the traveling pirate in the pants: charter member

    A friend will help you mend a broken heart; a best friend will get a shovel and help you dig the hole.

  3. #258
    disneydarling's Avatar
    disneydarling is offline ...and the mome raths outgrabe
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    sorry - i love this stuff

    Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
    Sisterhood of the traveling pirate in the pants: charter member

    A friend will help you mend a broken heart; a best friend will get a shovel and help you dig the hole.

  4. #259
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    Quote Originally Posted by disneydarling View Post
    sorry - i love this stuff.
    Thanx for the humor - keep it up!!

  5. #260
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    OK - just made this up (can ya tell?)

    The lightning bug was always flickering around with her friends - she was such a social-lite.

    (laughing optional)

  6. #261
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    tiggerguy is offline As God as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly
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    It's Back

    “The Department of Corrections has a large budget for liquid paper.”
    Brian
    WDWRadio Moderator

  7. #262
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    tiggerguy is offline As God as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly
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    “He rose through the ranks of the International Corn Growers association, eventually becoming a kernel.”
    Brian
    WDWRadio Moderator

  8. #263
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    Sign in an Egyptian funeral parlour:

    "Satisfaction guaranteed, or your mummy back."


  9. #264
    tiggerguy's Avatar
    tiggerguy is offline As God as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly
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    “The prisoner had a very short sentence. He was a contemporary.”
    Brian
    WDWRadio Moderator

  10. #265
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    Headline in Anaheim newspaper:

    Bear takes over Disneyland in Pooh D'Etat !

  11. #266
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    turkeymama is offline Christmas Shopping Rules!
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    Where do ya'll find this stuff?

    "You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you."
    Walt Disney











  12. #267
    tiggerguy's Avatar
    tiggerguy is offline As God as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly
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    “I get my large circumference from too much pi.”
    Brian
    WDWRadio Moderator

  13. #268
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    A fellow received a mouse for his birthday and he loved it so much that he never parted with it. He took this mouse everywhere, to work, to parties, to the opera... One day, a good friend of his died and so he went to pay his respects. Naturally, he took the mouse, which was perched on his shoulder.
    On his way home, he suddenly realized that the mouse was gone! He retraced all his moves for the day and realised that the last place he had seen the mouse was at the funeral. He raced back across town, but it was too late. The mouse must have jumped off his shoulder while he was sitting in the hearse. He spoke to the funeral directors, but they couldn't find it: it had completely vanished.
    The man was filled with grief as he remembered an old adage his mother had told him time and time again as a kid:

    Never lock a gift mouse in the hearse.

  14. #269
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    nicks_ahoy is offline Jungle VIP
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    Last year there was a boy named Tom and he was beat by his parents and custody was given to many different members of his family but they all beat him. Finally it was left to the Supreme Court to decide on who custody would be given to. The next day they decided the best people to give custody to would be the Dalls Cowboys because they were physically unable to "beat" anyone.
    Last edited by nicks_ahoy; 01-11-2007 at 11:04 PM.

  15. #270
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    Two boys are playing hockey on a pond in Fairmont Park when oneis suddenly attacked by a rabid rottweiler.

    Thinking quickly, the other boy takes his stick and shoves it under the dogs collar, twists it breaking the dog's neck and saving his friend.

    A reporter who was strolling by sees the incident. "Flyers Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal," he starts writing in his notebook.

    "But I'm not a Flyers fan," the little hero replied.

    "Sorry, since we are in Philadelphia I just assumed you were," said the reporter and he starts writing again. "Eagles Fan Rescues Friend From Horrific Attack."

    "I'm not an Eagles fan either," the boy said.

    "Oh, I assumed everyone in Philadelphia was either for the Eagles or the Flyers.

    What team do you root for?" the reporter asked.

    "I'm a Cowboys fan," the child said.

    The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes, "Little ******* From Dallas Kills Beloved Family Pet."
    Last edited by nicks_ahoy; 01-11-2007 at 10:54 PM.

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