Difficult Father in Law

Earlier I read a thread about a father who "didn't get it". Which made me look back at one of my recent trips with family that I figured I would share. My wife Lori and I were engages in Disney World in May of 2008 and while still on that trip we decided to get married in Disney World as well.

Once we broke the news to our family's things went a little south. They were all happy about the engagement, but her family wasnt exactly thrilled on the location of the wedding. Lori's step mother didn't want to go because Lori's half sister was only 2 and would not remember the trip. Her father didnt want to go because he would rather do a Sandals trip and have us married on the beach of Aruba. Lori's father thought Disney World was a six flags-esque park and as big as Disney Land (since he has never visted Disney World but has been to Disney Land as a kid). They fought us tooth and nail on everything and refused to talk about the trip or help decide on what to do and where to eat.

Since I planned the food and parks and my wife planned the wedding, it because a complete headache on my end. The wedding plans went off without a hitch and no one had any say in anything as it was Lori's day. However, after booking the dining reservations and what park to do which day, Lori's father had a fit about where we were eating. He quickly shot down the Biergarten and the Rose N' Crown. I switched reservations around to accomodate him so everyone would have a good time. Because I did this, I lost out on dining at Le Cellier which I thought everyone would enjoy.

After all that the rest of the planning went ok until it was time to pack. Lori's parents decided to ignore all the Disney stuff that came to them and threw it all away, which included there luggage tags and resort tags. They quickly blamed me for not telling them to look out for it. In the end, they had to carry there stuff to the DME.

Once in MCO, they called me to complain the DME line was to long and they didnt want to wait but while I was on the phone with them (10 min converstaion) they had already made it to the desk to check in. They arrived at our resort, OKW, about 45 minutes later and were now complaining there room wasnt ready and they had all thier baggage and that they were hungry. I tried to fix the problem by hvaing them drop off there luggage with bell services which they did but then complained they didnt have a change of clothes. Then I tried to get them to a restaurant to eat but they didnt want to visit Epcot where the rest of my family was already and made my wife and I eat at the resort. While I like the resort food, I was looking forward to Teppen Edo.

The rest of the week went the same way and there were arguements with her step mother and my family during the wedding because of rudeness. In the end, the wedding went well and the video and pictures and everything came out great. Then everyone left except for Lori and I.
We stayed for a few extra days as a honey moon\vacation after the wedding to just be by ourselves.

Once we got home, I received a call from my father in law wanting to speak to me more about the Disney trip. I figured this would be a horrible conversation and was not looking forward to it, but to my surprise it was great. He appologized for trying to make the trip a failure and being difficult. He admitted that he truely wanted to hate Disney World but in the end was more upset he wasted time complaining. He asked me for advice on the best way to get back there and is in the process of planning a trip with Lori and myself as well as the rest of his family for August 2011.

So even if someone wants to hate Disney they may not be able to.

Eek! Stories like this are exactly why I won't even attempt to plan to get married at Disney World. My boyfriends family would probably be alright with it (they wouldn't do it themselves, but they have had multiple family vacations there and like it), but MY parents would not go for it at all. They're very cheap people and I already dread planning a wedding with my mom because I know she'll try to get me to choose whatever venue/food/dress/etc is the cheapest... and while my Dad is my constant defender even though he doesn't understand me (my bf has said that on multiple occasions he has heard uncles and cousins complaining about me and wondering when I'll "grow out of it" and that my Dad always sticks up for me and tells them off and says that its something I enjoy and that they should respect that), he would definitely think I'm crazy. On top of that, they're also strict Catholics and my mom would cry for weeks if I chose to not get married in Catholic Church. You can't be married in the Catholic religion unless it's in an official Catholic Church, so you aren't married in the eyes of the Church if you marry at Disney World (since the wedding chapel is non-denominational). It's silly to me and my bf isn't Catholic anyhow, but it's all just not worth the crying and anger that would ensue. That and I have about a million cousins and I want to have them all at my wedding haha!

Anyways, it's nice that he apologized afterwords and ended up liking Disney! Too bad he didn't figure it out at the beginning of the trip BEFORE the wedding though!

Obviously everyone has their own opinions on what a wedding should or shouldn't be but to me Disney weddings always seemed like those wacky weddings you see on the news: A skydiving wedding or an underwater scuba wedding or one where the groom is dressed like a Luke Skywalker and the bride is a wookie...everyone is entitled to get married their own way but don't expect everyone who's involved to be as psyched about it as you.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by elvistelth

everyone is entitled to get married their own way but don't expect everyone who's involved to be as psyched about it as you.

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I'm always surprised by how classy (most of) the Disney weddings are (from looking at blogs and such) and very untacky they are. Although some people do have characters at their weddings... not really my thing! But ya, I would like a more traditional wedding in my home town. I agree that not everyone is going to psyched about a Disney wedding, and I would never expect anyone to be, but that still doesn't give them the excuse to be rude or try to sabotage a wedding and make it a failure on purpose. If a Disney wedding is what a couple chooses, then I think people should just let them be happy (unless its a huge money issue for guests, which I can see happening as well).

I agree no one should sabotage a wedding but some relatives will be great big pains in the grass whether the wedding is in WDW or a small town in the sticks.

Yaaaa you're probably right. Maybe I'll just elope :P (I'm sure my mom would LOVE that idea)

It would save her a lot of money.

True lol. She would be happy so long as I eloped in a white dress and in a Catholic Church somewhere with a real priest haha.

Also, with the original story and the "So even if someone wants to hate Disney they may not be able to." part.... I wish that this was true more often, but I think that more than not if people come with no interest in Disney and they set out to not like it, they're going to not like it. Which is true of most things in life really. But with my relatives who have been to Disney with me, if they had an open mind they had a good time, if they decided they would hate it they did (and never went back again even when they had small children). There's nothing you can do about that I guess. YOU like it and it makes you happy and that's what matters :) and besides, if we all converted everyone we knew into huge Disney fans, the parks would be WAY too crowded for us! :)

when it comes to weddings and baby & baby showers.. his or her family can always be a pain..

someone is always not going to like something!!! so i have come to term im going to do what i wanna do and everyone else can get over.. they can come and hush up about it.. or im going an they can sit their happy hinny there..

i get this every year when i plan my daughters bday.. someone dont like the place, the other dont like the day or time and they complain... you know what?

its my daughter.. its here birthday!! were going to do what she wants to do..

so what i have started is i say hey were taking her for pizza and games.. if you wanna go.. come on.. if you dont.. fine we dont need you there..

it always makes me so mad that aunts and uncles and grandparents think they have a say on stuff like that..