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Sea Turtles...........
I heard the Magic Kingdom is two stories actually. Where do you take the elevator at? All I see is sky above us.
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Don't be silly, you don't need an elevator to read two stories! Reading glasses, depends on your eyesight, and if you're just seeing nothing but sky, you're looking in the wrong direction for your two stories.
Why do they call it Spaceship Earth when it doesn't look like a Spaceship, doesn't go into space, and since when is the Earth spikey and metallic?
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You've missed several episodes of Star Wars. The FUTURE takes advantage of all of those shapes and metals. As for not being in space, we're ALL in space. Just check out any 2nd grade science book. We're just zipping through space like all the other planets.
I've never seen anyone escorted out of the parks. Does it happen very often?
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To preserve the magic, Disney does not escort non-compliant guests out of the park. They simply throw them in the dungeon with the life-size Maleficent dragon.
Why can't I stay for Mickey's Very Merry Christmas Party, I bought the daily admission ticket.
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Well that's just it, you've bought the daily admission ticket. The nightly admission ticket is a whole other matter. And anyway, we have it on good authority that you have been placed on the naughty list. If you would like to watch a parade please tune in on Christmas day.
What happened to the Carousel of Progress scenes between 1960 and 2020?
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Didn't you hear? Those years don't exist!
Was Mickey a mouse?
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Well Mickey prefers to be referred to as a "whiskered American of Rodent descent".
Everytime i ride test track a truck almost hits me, why does that guy still have a license?
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Duh, all licenses are issued for a lifetime at WDW.
If Main Street, USA is supposed to be reflective of turn of the century American towns, why is it always so crowded?
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The world was overpopulated in the turn of the century - the population has decreased since then...
So, why is the magic kingdom so "magic"?
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They are being ironic. There is absolutely no magic anywhere, its all just making you think your having a good time.
Can I live in the Swiss Family Treehouse?
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Actually, yes you can. There's this thing called the year of a million dreams. One of the prizes is an overnight stay in the tree house. You and your family get cots and sleeping bags and all the hot chocolate you can drink.
I just got a fastpass at Splash Mountain but the machine at Thunder Mountain won't let me have one? What's the deal?
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Well of course you fell victim to the Mountain Exclusion Clause wherein the "bearer" (You) is excluded from multiple mountainering because of the basic laws of physics (law 11.25_ stating that no person can be on or have part in to include Fastpass) two mountins at the same time, for fear of a temporal rift.
If Mickey was born in 1928 why isn't he all gray and old?
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Walt created Mickey out of NASA technology foam, so he never ages or loses his shape.
Why is the Year of a Million Dreams going to be 16-18 months long?
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because that's the length of a "mouse" year.
Why does Goofy wear clothes, but Pluto doesn't?
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Beacause Goofy walks upright whereas walks on all fours. (In other words, Goofy can keep his clothes clean).
Do any of the characters ever get to leave the park or are they just permanently ensconced there?